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LONG PROMISED PHOTO OF PREVIOUS GESTURE OF THE DAY:
By way of reminder: When you answer a question right or do anything remotely impressive, give the basketball shot motion with the hand hanging overhead on the follow through as the imaginary shot goes through the imaginary hoop...and just leave it hanging up there indefinitely. Until it becomes really awkard (or your arm falls asleep--whichever comes first.)
PRESENT OF THE DAY:
A T-shirt with "Fast Old White Guy" written on it. A belated birthday present from my basketball buddy Stevie Jumpshot. Photo forthcoming. I seem to be on a one photo per post limit.
WISH OF THE DAY:
That this aborted London plane bombing plot can go ten minutes without becoming politicized. Ooops. Too late.
THING THAT MAKES YOU GO "ARGGG" OF THE DAY:
Obviously, it's a huge relief that this London plane bombing plot was nipped in the bud by the vigilant British intelligence services. Hail Brittania. But I am disgusted that it is being used by the Iraq war supporters (and the right wing in general) in a shameless attempt to gain political advantage. People like Cheney and Lieberman couldn't wait 10 minutes from the announcement of the arrests to slam democrats for not taking terrorism seriously. In fact, many democrats take the terrorist threat so seriously that they are determined to see it addressed in more intelligent and effective ways than this administration is doing. (There is little doubt that the war in Iraq has been fanning the flames of Islamic fanaticism and, as a result, has made us less rather than more safe. And there is little doubt that if this episode has proved anything it's the superiority of effective intelligent police work over diffuse military engagement in the fight against al qaeda type terrorists.). In fact, no sooner had Lieberman and Cheney used the event to indict the "soft" democratic "friends of al qaeda", than it was revealed that the 9/11 obsessed, War of Terror crazed administration had, in its infinite wisdom and while the terrorists had been hatching their plan, actually been in the process of diverting funds from bomb detecting technologies at airports--another in a series of moves that lead critics of the administration to question their commitment to innovative anti terrorist measures and technologies or at least their competence in this context.
Full article at:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20060811/ap_on_go_ot/terror_explosives_detection_4
Also, from a report in the NYT today:
"The nation is still at risk from the same “failure of imagination” cited by the 9/11 commission as having contributed to the success of the 2001 attack, several argued.
“They are reactive, not proactive,” said Randall J. Larsen, a retired colonel in the Air Force who is chairman of the military strategy department at the National War College in Washington."
Full article at:
http://www.nytimes.com/2006/08/12/washington/12homeland.html?hp&ex=1155441600&en=1d0e4381818a92b4&ei=5094&partner=homepage
Again. Like many critics of the administration, I have no desire to politicize this event. But once people like Cheney have used it to indict the opposition party, it behooves us to point out the contradictions and absurdities of their position. Blah blah blah...Etc. Etc. Etc...Argg Argg Argg...
PHENOMENON IN NEED OF A NAME OF THE DAY:
The feeling that what happened that morning was so long ago as to feel like it was part of a different day. It's as common an experience as deja vu, but it has no words to describe it. Any suggestions? Best suggestion wins a "Support our SUVs" or an "If we become less dependent on oil then the terrorists have already won" Karl Rove inspired Teddy Vegas branded bumper sticker.
ANOTHER THING THAT MAKES YOU GO "ARGGG" OF THE DAY:
The simultaneous revelation that the very rich are failing to pay their taxes in record numbers and the announcement of cuts in the department of the IRS dedicated to the auditing of wealthy people's returns.
OBSERVATION OF THE DAY:
While we are all suddenly terrified of the combinatory explosive potential of certain chemical liquids (say, acetone plus concentrated hydrogen peroxide), we cannot lose sight of the fact that the truly combustible combination is intense hatred plus systematic brain washing. These people are insane murdering machines--who must be stopped by any means necessary.
TERRIFYING COMBINATIONS OF THE DAY/RECYCLING OR REPHRASING ACT OF THE DAY:
Acetone plus hydrogen peroxide.
Intense hatred plus systematic brain washing.
This latter combination causes a depraved indifference to human life. And speaking of depraved indifference: Have you heard about this immensely popular "Bumfight" video series--wherein desperate and often mentally ill homeless people are videotaped doing horribly undignified and self destructive "jackass" type stunts (including beating each other senseless) in exchange for some sorely needed food or drink money? It's almost as bad as kiddie porn. Just wrong. A despicably exploitative diversion for a society that is losing all sense of human decency.
TEDDY VEGAS BRANDED QUESTION OF THE DAY:
Who has a more depraved indifference to humanity and human suffering: The people who were plotting the "planes bursting in air" attack in London or the people who make, market and enjoy videos in which mentally ill desperate homeless people are bribed out of their last shred of human dignity? And why? Please keep answers to 100 words or less.
UNFUNNY COMEDIAN STORY OF THE DAY:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20060809/ap_en_tv/robin_williams
Robin Williams bombs, gets bombed.
Happily, Robin Williams didn't wait till he went on an anti-semitic rant before he checked himself into rehab. But, sadly, after 20 years, he fell off the wagon and is drinking again. My guess is it's finally gotten to him that an entire generation of younger people (and by now most people in any age bracket) have realized he is simply not funny. That what used to pass as improvisational genius is really just a lot of concatenated tics and schtick. This is the worst thing that can happen to a guy so transparently in need of love and approval. So desperate to suck on the imaginary breast of the audience's love. Once the imaginary breast of the audience's laughter was withdrawn, he went back to the substitute breast of the bottle. Sad. And leads obliquely to our
TRUISM OF THE DAY:
There's nothing sadder than a mamma's boy whose mamma never loved him.
QUOTE OF THE DAY:
(In re Robin Williams' bombing at recent stand-up appearances--failures that one suspects were instrumental in his return to alcohol.)
You never like to see anyone get humiliated. Unless it's a good friend.
--Eric the IT guy.
CHALLENGE OF THE DAY: NAMING THE ENEMY
Evidently, many in the Muslim world have taken exception to Bush's most recent description of the enemy as "Islamic-Fascism." The feeling is that it implies that there is something inherent to Islam that invites this kind of totalitarian extremism. To my mind, the problem with the term "Islamic fascist" is that it defines this enemy in the context of secular absolutistic enemies of democratic society--like Naziism. While it’s probably a more accurate description of our enemy than "The War on Terror" is of our battle against them, it is still essentially misleading in that it implies a secular rather than a religious (indeed, an apocalyptic, eschatological) basis for their beliefs and motivation for their actions. But be that as it may. If there is any interest in avoiding alienating potentially moderate and sympathetic Muslims, I think the key challenge is to find a name that delegitimizes the enemy in the eyes of Islam rather than define it in terms of Islam. Some thoughts, in generally descending order of intended seriousness (with a sudden return to seriousness at the end):
Fraudulent Fanatical Islam
Fraudulent Islam
Murderously manipulated Islam
Fanatical Islam.
Fatally Falsified Islamic
Counterfeit Islamic Extremism.
Betrayers of Allah
Murderously distorted Islam--and its fanatical adherents.
Murderous Religious Fanaticism of the Islamic Variety.
Islamic Kamikazes.
Pseudo-Islamic death merchants
Homicidal Allah-Crazed Lunatics from Hell.
Death-Crazed Islamic Lunatic Motherfuckers.
Hijackers of Planes and Islam
Situation Normal Allah Fucked Up-ism.
Or, wait, how about the name they actually have that Bush and Cheney seldom use and that in no way references Islam :
Al Qaeda
ARTICLE OF THE DAY: (Well, of a few days ago)
BHL article on Israel in Sunday's NYT Magazine section. Eschewed his usual sophomoromic speculations. A welcomed reminder that there are Israeli civilian casualties here too. That Israel is not the monolithic military machine--insensitive to life, hell bent on vengeful destruction --that one might conclude it is from the media coverage (Sorry, forgot the media was Jewish controlled, Mel), but rather a tortured, conflicted people solemnly (and reluctantly) taking the grim and rightful steps they feel they must in the face of a serious pan-Islamic threat to their well being--if not survival . In other words, it's a tragic mess all around for Israelis, Lebanese and Palestinians--and one that is arguably being cynically manipulated by Iran and Syria via Hezbollah.
PEEVE OF THE DAY:
There is a new campaign in the subways for "Secret" deodorant. Shamelessly stealing (repurposing, appropriating) an idea from a popular website (www.postsecret.blogspot.com), it features alleged "Secrets" submitted by "strong independent women"--in the aim of forging an emotional consumer connection with the brand and selling more product. The secrets are all scrubbed and safe--a commercial attempt to domesticate deception and plunder privacy for profit. "I spend half an hour each day applying makeup to make it look like I'm not wearing make-up," confesses one copywriter. "We eloped last week, " bravely shares another etc. Something in the tidily constructed commercialization of unruly and innermost truth makes me want to tear the ribbon off this little packet of lies (fictionalized untruths masquerading as innermost truths) and sully them with the disruptive force of reality--graffiti-ing secrets like "I masturbate while thinking about my husband's best friend every night" or even the more specifically relevant "I stole this campaign idea from a popular website which is much MUCH better." I think it's only a matter of time before less brand-friendly secrets such as these start popping up in the margins of the posters. I give it less than a week.
IDEA OF THE DAY
A simultaneous visual representation of what's going on between Israel and Lebanon and what is going on inside Ariel Sharon's brain. I wonder if there is some oblique awareness of the former in the latter. Some vague intimation of the chaos that rages all around him. And even if there is not, it's an interesting conceit--that the two somehow mirror one another in some unaccountable way.
WORD THAT IS A DIFFERENT PART OF SPEECH DIFFERENT FROM WHAT IT SOUNDS LIKE OF THE DAY:
Contumely (n.)
CURIOUS PATTERN OF THE DAY:
I am sure there is nothing here, but it is numerologically (sp?) striking that the S.S. Cole and Bali attacks both happened on 10/12, the WTC attacks happened on 9/11 and this London plot was revealed on 8/10. Just to be on the safe side, I'd be pushing the terror alert to "Bug-eyed" if not to "We're fucked!" on 7/9 and on 11/13.
TOUGH CALL OF THE DAY:
Don’t know what I’m more alienated from …people who exploit 9/11 for a right wing political agenda or the looney tunes who insist it was a conspiracy.
WISH I HAD A CAMERA WITH ME MOMENT OF THE DAY:
Amputee skahing a cup and sitting beside his (removed) artificial leg --in front of a renovated builidng which had "Pre-War" written huge in the first floor window. I wish I'd taken the shot and then altered it to "Post-War" in photoshop.
IRAQ GOOD NEWS OF THE DAY:
While killing 35 people, the suicide bombing that took place in Najaf today was way way way less impressive and way way way less destructive than the ones that were being planned in London. Frankly, by comparison, they were downright rinky dink.
BITTERSWEET MOMENT OF THE DAY:
Affirming yet sort of depressing to hear that Conan O'Brien did a "Ways Mel Gibson Can Seek Forgiveness From the Jews" bit last night. Note: It took great restraint to use the indefinite article "a" rather than the possessive pronoun "my" in the previous sentence. My friend told me it was pretty funny and that the best one was "By giving Mel Brooks a foot massage." When my friend maintained friend-in-good-standing status by telling me that he thought my version of the bit was funnier, I feigned modesty by saying that the TV guys must have been totally constrained by what you could get away with on network TV-- but internally I really wanted to bust out with my aforementioned (and above photographed) post basketball shot hanging wrist gesture of the day.
MORTAL MOMENT OF THE DAY:
At the dentist the other day, while scheduling my next cleaning, I looked behind the hygienist's head and saw an aerial shot of NYC with the Twin Towers still in it. It was as if they'd been photoshopped in. As if they had never been there. It felt like an evocation of a common dream we all lived in and from which we were all rudely awakened. Memento Mori in tandem. Awesome reminders of dizzying impermanence. Mutability and mortality writ large.
Speaking of impermanence--and the imaginary fabric of things:
I've recently been thinking that I haven't memorized any poems or poetic passages in ages (all the poems and Shakespearean passages I know by heart were memorized in high school and college) so this weekend I decided to find something new to commit to memory. It turns out that one of the things I ended up being drawn to was the beautiful little monologue which closes "The Tempest", Shakespeare's final play.
"Our revels now are ended. These our actors
As I foretold you, were spirits and
Are melted into air, into thin air.
And like the baseless fabric of this vision,
The cloud-capped towers, the gorgeous palaces,
the solemn temples, the great globe itself,
Yea, all which it inherit, shall dissolve
And, like this insubstantial pageant faded,
leave not a rack behind. We are such stuff as dreams
are made on. And our little life
Is rounded by a sleep.
The mention of "cloud-capped towers" that "shall dissolve...and leave not a rack behind" eerily evoked the Twin Towers I'd seen earlier that day at the dentists. And as I read these words again, it struck me how beautiful a phrase "into thin air" truly is (we are blinded to its beauty by habit and proximity) and how Shakespeare probably coined it in this passage. I thought about how we all still live in the shadow of Shakespeare--much as we long lived in the shadow of the Twin Towers. And how Shakespeare and the Towers have both passed into thin air and how both, in their passing, never cease to remind us that all things, ultimately, do.
Anyhow, I think it might be fitting and moving to have that passage from The Tempest written over that old aerial photo of NYC with the Twin Towers still standing.
EPIPHANY OF THE DAY:
I had this eureka moment while watching "Little Miss Sunshine," a charming and funny paen to the redeeming value of family--even in its most obstreperously dysfuncitonal form: Close your eyes while Alan Arkin is talking and he instantly becomes Christopher Walken.
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Posted on 8/12/2006
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