A (slightly expanded) Post from Teddy Knoxville

PIC OF THE DAY:

A) A reminder of the supreme importance of memory in human experience?
B) A memorial placard for the number one?
C) A tune-in ad for New York 1?
D) A reminder to remember which row you parked your car in?

The fact that it was located in a parking garage at an airport would tend to suggest that the last option was the intended one, but, alas, context can never fully determine meaning and the unruly signifier can always find a way to wriggle free. I'm going with option (B).

NEWS ITEM OF THE DAY:

Iran said they don’t give a damn about U.N. resolutions. Sounds like their leaders and ours really aren’t so far apart after all.

MOTTO OF THE DAY/T-SHIRT IDEA OF THE DAY:

You’re only as good as your last nap.

UPDATE OF THE DAY:

Still no check from the Cherry Hill scammer.

But I am hell bent on amortizing that $30 expense (loan?????) with ongoing references to it on the blog. C’mon, I know you're all dying of curiosity and keep checking in here every ten minutes to see if the matter's been resolved. Does Vegas know his reader(s) or what???

Actually, for what it's worth, I have received about 15 e-mail votes in response to the Vegas Branded Interactive Poll of the day. And let's just say, not one of you believes I will ever see a penny of that $30 loan again. But--oh blessed power of denial!-- that doesn't stop me from calling it a loan.

QUOTE OF THE DAY:

From Commissioner Bud Selig, in re the Major League's official position towards Barry Bonds and his assault on Henry Aaron's record. "He's had a remarkable career. Whatever happens, happens," Selig said. "We're going to let nature take its course. Commissioners don't sit around and say, 'I hope this guy breaks it or not."'

Nature taking its course.

I suspect if nature had taken its course, Barry would have about 550 home runs right now. And still have a human sized head.

PROS VS. CONS ANALYSIS OF THE DAY:

I board a very small 16 seat plane for a business trip to Knoxville, Tennessee. (Yes, Knoxville, Tennessee.) I’m thinking: On the upside, it’s too small to make a dent in a terrorist target, so it probably won’t get hijacked. Plus it’s so small it’d be really hard to hit with a shoulder held land-to-air missile. But on the downside, it’s so small that if a couple of fat people sit on the same side of the aisle, we go into a death spin. What are you gonna do? Nothing’s perfect. You’ve gotta take the good with the bad.

SONGS OF THE DAY:

(Sung to the tune of Paul Simon’s “Graceland”)

“I’m going to Knoxville, Knoxville, Knoxville Tennessee I’m going to Knoxville.”

Sung to the tune of Paul Simon’s “Only Living Boy in New York”

“And here I am…the only Jewish boy in Knoxville…”

PLEASURE OF THE DAY:

Listening to Ralph Kiner astutely slurring.

DANGLING PHRASE OF THE DAY:

Like winking through a one way mirror.

OBSERVATION OF THE DAY:

The service economy: Brilliantly engineered to thwart you with a smile.

CORRECTION OF THE DAY:

In my previous post, I mistakenly identified the photo as showing me and my Peeps. I've been informed by my crack staff of Seasonal Confectionary Advisors that the yellow creature with whom I am appearing is properly refered to as a singular Peep. So, evidently, what you were looking at was not a photo of me and my Peeps but rather a photo of me and my Peep. My deep apologies for any misunderstanding. And to the entire Peep community for any perceived disrespect. By the way, let me take this opportunity to assure everyone that no Peeps were injured during the making of that photograph, although a few were eaten.

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Posted on 4/29/2006 ( Permanent Link )
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