15 MORE UNNATURAL SHOCKS THAT FLESH IS HEIR TO AND SOME OTHER STUFF

LETTER OF THE DAY:

I wrote the following letter to the NYT based on an observation previously made in this blog and, since it appears that they have decided not to publish it, I figured I'd post it here:

Recently, the U.S. Army confirmed that more U.S. soldiers had killed themselves in 2007 than in any year on record ("Suicide Rate for Soldiers Rose in '07", NYT 5/30). Of the 115 U.S. Army suicides reported, 32 of them had been committed by troops stationed in Iraq. While it is difficult to find figures to confirm this, it appears that -in what would be an excruciating irony--the number of troops who committed suicide in Iraq last year may very well be greater than the number of troops who were killed by suicide bombers.

Could one possibly ask for a more acute indictment of the moral clarity of our mission or of the material and mental preparedness of those brave individuals whom we've asked to carry it out?

Tragically, despite empty symbolic appeals on bumpers everywhere, we are not supporting our troops.

MORE UNNATURAL SHOCKS THAT FLESH IS HEIR TO: (Only 924 to go!)

Seeing the house you grew up in from the instantly accessible, totally impersonal perspective of satellite Google maps.

The Swiftboating-Waterboarding Axis of "Good."

The permanent campaign model of the Presidency.

The walking cane as ironic hipster accoutrement.

Jeans with holes in them costing more than jeans without holes in them.

Those Existenz ads that run during ESPN Sportscenter for a supplement that makes "a certain part of the male anatomy larger." (I suspect that in order to meet the legal standards for truth in advertising, that they do indeed make a certain part of the male anatomy larger: Only that part is the liver or kidney.)

The greasy film left in your mouth after a meal at Qdoba. />
Pet time-shares for the wealthy and noncommital

Corn-fed Steer.

Ralph Nader's relentless campaign to tarnish his own legacy.

Seeing Roger Federer with totally defeated body language.

The use of Glade as a drug.

The fact that amputated legs of albino human beings are now considered a good luck charm in Indonesia.

Athletes using Viagra as a performance enhancer. (And I thought that whole "I take it so I can score whenever the manager puts me in the game" business was metaphorical!)

http://www.nydailynews.com/sports/baseball/yankees/2008/06/09/2008-06-09_source_roger_clemens_host_of_athletes_po.html

The NYT's failure to publish my letter.

SOON TO BE UBIQUITOUS EUPHEMISM OF THE DAY:

I had no horse.

FOOTNOTE OF THE DAY:

The above phrase comes from the jockey of Big Brown, the overwhelming favorite to win the Triple Crown today at the Belmont Stakes but who came up with bupkis--and actually finished last. When interviewed about what happened the jockey, Kent Desormeaux, explained "I don't know what happened. He's the best I've ever ridden, but coming around the turn, I just knew I had no horse."

TRIBUTE OF THE DAY:

RIP Jim McKay. With whom I spent the five hundred Saturdays of youth and, in the summer of 1972, lost a big part of my innocence. (The Munich Olympics).

STRANGE REFLECTION OF THE DAY:

Saw "I'm Not There"--Todd Haynes' fractured po-mo Bob Dylan bio-pic. The film posits the death of a fictional Bob Dylan character and then tracks the loose storylines of his 6 internal personae (The Liar, The Poet, The Actor etc.). What was strange and dislocating was seeing the fictionally dead living person (Dylan) played by an actually dead actor (Heath Ledger.). Yet another of life's ironic inversions.

GREATEST THING EVER OF THE DAY:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rssxrTmpm48

An amazing performance of the best break-up song ever--and one of the most moving expressions of wounded pride, defiant anger and raw pain in any artistic medium.

PAINFUL EXPERIENCE OF THE DAY:

Seeing Father's Day ads popping up everywhere.

RANDOM SINGLE SENTENCE PORTRAIT OF THE DAY:

His motto was "I don't like to whine, but they say you shouldn't hide your gifts."

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